Monday, May 16, 2016

Flying Hill

My wife, Lan, loves to play blackjack. When we first started going to Reno, she had yet to learn how to count cards and would usually play until the money she brought with her was gone. She often ended up in marathon sessions with very little sleep.

On our way home from one of these Reno trips, Lan was really tired and spent most of the time sleeping in the car. She happened to wake up just as we started up the Altamont pass towards Livermore. It was a windy afternoon and almost all of the turbines on the huge Altamont wind farm were spinning furiously.

She looked out the window for a minute and then said, "I don't care how many airplane engines they put on that hill, it isn't going to fly."

Wedding Vows

When Lan and I decided to get married, we opted to keep it simple and cheap. After our blood test results came back, we went to the court house and paid $5 for our license.

Once we had our license, we waited upstairs in the judge's antechamber for him to perform our marriage ceremony.  He came out about 4:30pm and said, "I have to listen to losers and their lawyers all day, so I like to perform a few marriages before I go home. It puts me in a much better mood."

When the judge got to the part where he asked Lan to say I do, she started to laugh. As we were leaving the court house I asked her why she laughed when the judge asked her to say I do. She said, "The judge asked if I do, but I did already."

In Vietnamese, du translates to fuck.

Tuesday, May 3, 2016

The Rainbow

I was headed east on Interstate 40 in Arizona just before sunset. A huge thunderstorm was gathering strength in front of me, and behind me the sun was about to dip below the horizon.

The setting sun was bouncing gorgeous shades of gold off the rocky cliffs that lined both sides of the the highway. Suddenly, a vivid, full spectrum rainbow appeared painted against the black eastern sky. Its ends seemed to be anchored in the illuminated cliffs.

I pulled off the freeway to stop and take it all in. Within minutes, cars were stopping on both sides of the freeway. People got out of their cars to take pictures, show their kids, and just marvel at the spectacle.

It was the Arizona desert at its most magnificent!